My last post had Beej thinking I was giving up on the weight loss journey for good.
Thankfully, no. I'm still on the right path, even with the odd foray down temptation trail.
It's clear, however, that I need to work on handling my emotions around eating and weight loss/gain.
When I'm in my home routine and habitat, things zip along on auto pilot most of the time, and I'm very happy with that. My weight loss has been rather slow -- if you compare me to many others out there in the blogosphere -- but 70 lbs in a bit over a year is certainly nothing to sneeze at. But going slow (ish) has a couple of advantages: less shock to the body's skin (I hope, at least) and more time to ingrain good habits.
The good habits have, for the most part, taken hold for me. I surprise myself at times with what I now do without second thought. Things I'd never have done before, or had to grit my teeth and force myself to do. Like refuse bread/crackers at the soup store when I get low-cal soups. Or remove the top layer of the bun if I order a burger or big sandwich somewhere. I like bread, it's just too much for me to eat now.
I still have to work on not letting my demons take hold. Demons for me are boredom, frustration, loneliness, depression (not anything serious, just a spot of the blues now and again) and food lust. You know, when you look at food and give it so much power -- I have to have it! It's so good! O my goodness, I can't resist that!
All those thoughts are just tricks of the mind. The food is never (rarely) THAT good -- worth sabotaging yourself for. And it's JUST FOOD. And I can resist it. I often do.
But I've figured out that my binges come when I flip switches in my head. Most of the time I am now able to operate in long-term mode. Meaning my long-term weight goals are uppermost in my mind and I act accordingly -- those come first. But when I lose control, it's because I've flipped a switch and gone into short-term mode, when all that matters is handling whatever emotion I'm currently gripped by.
Ergo, I'm working on how I can flip that switch back -- immediately -- when I realize it's changed into the dangerous position. This is what I need to remember going through the holidays. And every day, really.
HOT 100 update: haven't been back to corporate gym in over a week, but that's high on my list for today. Gotta get back in the saddle, so to speak.
July 23rd, 2017 Very Particular
4 hours ago